Why I Procrastinate

    Teacher's are always quick to assume that procrastination by a student is a direct product of that student's laziness, lack of motivation, or complete indifference to the subject at hand. Well, I have a different view. I believe that we all procrastinate for different reasons. Here is mine:

I don't entirely believe in reality.

Of course, I probably owe a little bit of explanation on behalf of my blatant statement. It's why I can't ever bring myself to do urgent homework assignments or do things that I don't particularly enjoy at all without much forcing on the behalf of my own guilt as well as the ever impeding parental unit. Yes, I am capable of forcing myself through such tasks, but hardly ever when it is in place of playing a piece of music or just going outside and staring at the sky. 

The great philosopher Rene Descartes suggested that all we can really know and believe in is our own consciousness. The more I am pushed towards extensive amounts of work that I have no interest in, the more I think to myself "So what if I don't do it?". Then there's the question of if it really even exists...if it really even matters. Yes, the work exists within my own consciousness, but, since it exists only in my own consciousness, couldn't I make it cease to exist? And here's the deal; I am completely in love with life. Whether this entire world is reality or not, I want to soak it all in. I want to be outside and hear music and enjoy every little aspect of it that my soul pleases. I think it is a sin to waste the limited time that I have been gifted in whatever this marvelous dream is that I'm living in doing things that I detest, like sitting in front of a computer for hours writing essays and blogs or buried in a textbook filled with subject matter that I am nothing but indifferent to. Especially when outside there is a sunset that is made up of all my favorite colors and I'm sitting here missing it all.

But the problem is, What if all of this is real? If it's definitely not a dream or anything inside my head and I am never going to wake up from it? Then I suppose I will have to face the consequences of my actions. However, this is a thought that for now, I can not really bear to think of, and it is the fear that arises from such a thought that still keeps me half way on track.