Why All of You Are Wrong and I'm Right: A Minor Tantrum on Name Pronunciation.

       Bad at spelling? Nah. I'd rather write this blog about the issue of being BAD AT PRONUNCIATION. Why, though? Here's why: Sethe's (from Beloved) name is pronounced as such:

S-ehh-th.

Not "Seth-eeee" or See-thee" or "S-ehh-thh-uhhhh". You guys...those aren't even names! Like, nobody comes up with that. Her name is pronounced as it is bolded above. Here is why:

1. Seth is a name that is very plausible. There are many people who are named Seth. 
2. Typically, in most Western languages, an "e" is added to the end of a girl's name to assert that it is feminine and belongs to a girl. This "e" added at the end is most always silent. We should therefore logically conclude that "Sethe" is simply the feminine version of "Seth". Here are a few examples:
• Lucille (pronounces as "lew-seal", not "lew-silly" or "lew-sill-uh".
• Vivienne
• Danielle (This is an especially good example because we see that it is the feminine form of "Daniel".)
• Brianne
3. Notice that the above names had two consonants (a consonant blend) preceeding the SILENT "e" at the end of the name. In classic English phonics, when an e comes after two consonants, the "e" is silent and the vowel preceeding the consonant blend is not pronounced in its capital form (ex, "a" would be pronounced "ahh" as in "fat" instead of like "ayyy" as in "face"). Therefore, we can conclude that "See-thee" is out of the equation. Here are a few examples of what I mean:
• Moustache (pronounced "moo-stash", not "mooo-stay-ch-eee")
• Toilette
• Blithe (pronounced "B-lie-th", not "B-lith-ee")
• Binge
4. Yes, I understand that there are exceptions to the rules. There are SO many exceptions to the fricken' rules! But here's what doesn't make sense to me. Why can't we just follow the rules with this one, you guys?! Why are you so quick to conclude some obscure name that nobody even thinks of when the normal pronunciation that sounds like "Seth" makes so much sense?!!!! I just don't get it. I want to scream every single day in class because I'm just like, "Why are we saying this? Seethee isn't even a name!!!". 
5. It doesn't even make sense as a name. Nobody else in that book, despite how weird it is, has a name that is completely unusual for the English Language. Even Baby Suggs sounds like an ENGLISH nickname. Pronounced with English Phonics.Here's some examples of how normal (as in plausible) every single other name is there:
• Amy Denver, Baby Suggs, Denver, Paul D, Beloved, Mrs. Bodwin, Horace, Bulgar, Schoolteacher, Mr. and Mrs. Garner.....ALL OF THESE ARE NORMAL. Morrison just "out of the blue" isn't going to call a character some weird name like "Seethee" or "Seethuh" or "Sethuh". 
6. Toni Morrison is a weirdo. We all know she's a weirdo. I mean, look at this book! She knows she's weird, we know she's weird, and if she wants a name to be pronounced weird, she's gonna spell it weird because I think she's OBVIOUSLY pretty proud of her weirdness. If Morrison wanted it to be Seethee or Sethuhh or Seethuh or whatever weird stuff you guys keep throwing out there in class, she would be bold and spell it that way so she could continue to say to the world "Look at me! I won a Nobel Prize AND I'm a weirdo!". 

So please. Please somebody read this blog and please be normal about pronouncing. That's all I ask.